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Godbledygook: The Second-Tallest Tale Ever Told*
Once upon a time, there was a Godbledygook. The Godbledygook was all-knowing and all-powerful. The Godbledygook was also a mature hermaphrodite.
Being mature, Godbledygook began to focus its intelligence on the design of a family. Having engaged in an appropriately extensive session of family planning, Godbledygook copulated itself and thus conceived a singularity.
The singularity gestated within Godbledygook for a long, long time -- approximately 6,000 years. Then the singularity was ready to be born. Godbledygook labored for six days and six nights and then there was a “bang!” That bang was so monumental that it would one day be judged to have been “big.”
During the bang, the singularity grew bigger and bigger and it eventually filled an almost incomprehensible volume of space. That volume contains galaxies and stars and planets and moons and comets and other miscellaneous flotsam. Godbledygook looked upon the volume and saw that it was good enough. Godbledygook named it Cosmos.
In accordance with Godbledygook’s plan, one of the planets in the Cosmos was not too hot and not too cold. Godbledygook saw that the planet was good enough and named it Earth.
For one thousand millions years -- give or take a few millennia -- Earth’s waters passed again and again through volcanic vents in the depths of the oceans. During these passages, the waters became enriched with many kinds of complicated molecules, all in accordance with Godbledygook’s intelligently designed plan. And then, right on cue, some of those complicated molecules began making copies of themselves. Godbledygook saw that these copies were good enough and named them Life.
Life flourished in the warm waters of Earth, making more and more copies of itself. Some kinds of copies were better at copying themselves than were other kinds of copies. These better copiers proliferated, while the less efficient kinds of copies became extinct. Then a copy named Charles Darwin noticed this process. He described this process as evolution by natural selection.
You are a product of this process. And you owe your life to Godbledygook. Be thankful. Send a Thank You note to Godbledygook, in care of Santa Claus, North Pole, Arctic Ocean.
Amen.
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*The first-tallest tale ever told may be found at http://www.family.org/cforum/citizenmag … 005469.cfm
"Analysis, whether economic or other, never yields more that a statement about the tendencies present in an observable pattern." Joseph A. Schumpeter; Capitalism, Socialism and Democracy, 1942
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In summary, Phillip Johnson goes around scaring anyone who agrees to talk to him. He also claims to have a wedgie.
Thanks for the heads up, Phillip. :laugh:
"We go big, or we don't go." - GCNRevenger
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