Joke

Dook · 2005-10-22 19:10:08

An angel walks into a bar and sits down next to a drunk. The drunk leans over and asks "Hey angel, what's the meaning of life?"

The angel laughs and laughs and laughs, then says "You are!"

Josh Cryer · 2005-10-22 23:21:01

I don't get it. :?

Dook · 2005-10-23 06:24:14

You want to know what the meaning of life is?

Everything that exists is the meaning of life.

Chairs, glasses, alcohol, air, water, wood, rocks, planets, suns, nebulas, black holes, and the most important of all, the plants, animals, and sentient beings.

You want to know what your purpose in life is? It's what you are. If you drive a taxi, then that is your purpose. If you are a nurse, then that is your purpose. A drunk, then that is your purpose. God didn't make us each to fill a specific job. He had something much more important in mind. He gave us free will to create and to choose our own purpose.

God doesn't design vehicles, humans do.

God didn't come up with the Constitution, we did that.

God just made the materials available.

In the beginning, God (father) was alone. He wanted to create a universe full of incredible things and fill it with sentient beings that could create for themselves what they wanted. But there was no matter, no material for anything to form. So God created a being just like Him (Son) with the same powers and with the mission of governing and guarding God's intent for the universe. Then God sacrificed His form and His energy became all the matter, and energy, in the universe.

Does this sound similiar to what Jesus did? It should.

Everything that you see, feel, and touch is God. You are God. God's soul, His eternal sentient energy (Holy Ghost) remains.

Now wouldn't an angel, who knows where we really came from and the incredible sacrifice it took, find if laughable that we still, somehow, don't quite understand the meaning of our own creation?

clark · 2005-10-24 07:27:41

Your joke is not funny.

If you want to hit us with a bible, just be up front about it.

Dook · 2005-10-24 14:53:56

That joke isn't from the bible.

You want a funny joke. Okay, here's one:

Little Timmy is getting pretty hot and heavy with his girlfriend so he rides his tricycle down to the local 7eleven to buy a rubber. He only has .75 but they are .75 each so he grabs one and walks to the front. There are a few people in line so he walks up and down the isles until they all leave then he goes up to pay. The lady rings up the price and says "That'll be eighty cents." Little Timmy says "I thought it was only seventy-five cents. What's the other five cents for?" The lady says "Tax."

Timmy looks sad as he thinks, then he asks "You mean it doesn't stay on by itself?"

John Creighton · 2005-10-24 15:17:36

That joke isn't from the bible.
You want a funny joke. Okay, here's one:
Little Timmy is getting pretty hot and heavy with his girlfriend so he rides his tricycle down to the local 7eleven to buy a rubber. He only has .75 but they are .75 each so he grabs one and walks to the front. There are a few people in line so he walks up and down the isles until they all leave then he goes up to pay. The lady rings up the price and says "That'll be eighty cents." Little Timmy says "I thought it was only seventy-five cents. What's the other five cents for?" The lady says "Tax."
Timmy looks sad as he thinks, then he asks "You mean it doesn't stay on by itself?"

That sounds to painful to be funny and why is little timmy the subject of the Joke?

John Creighton · 2005-10-24 15:24:30

Now to continue the joke.
The drunk turns to the angle and askes why?
The angel proceeds to give a long winded explanation about how we are all fulfilling gods purpose.
The drunk turns to the bartender and says, I’ll have what she’s drinking.

Commodore · 2005-10-24 20:34:47

I guess philosophy and humor don't mix.

Josh Cryer · 2005-10-25 02:03:39

Now to continue the joke.
The drunk turns to the angle and askes why?
The angel proceeds to give a long winded explanation about how we are all fulfilling gods purpose.
The drunk turns to the bartender and says, I’ll have what she’s drinking.

Now that's funny!

clark · 2005-10-25 05:22:25

The drunk turns to the angle and asks, "why?"

The angle was obtuse in reply.

Josh Cryer · 2005-10-25 10:37:00

Harhar, clark. You can be such a nerd sometimes.

We should make this a joke thread.

I only know dirty jokes though, so I'll have to refrain. But boy howdy, I know some doozies.

clark · 2005-10-25 12:02:47

What does a crooked line complain about?

Being maligned.

Stormrage · 2005-10-30 07:53:09

There was only one joke in this thread that made sense and was actually funny. It was the one John made. The rest were painfully bad.

DonPanic · 2005-10-30 18:27:04

LO
A dude french Foreign Legion soldier arrives in a casern in Sahara desert.
The place officer welcomes him, makes him visit the casern, shows him all commodities, the mess, his dormitory place.
Soldier asks : "huh, Captain, and for sex ?"
Says the officer: "That's what camels are here for, too"
One night, as the officer rounds up for survey, he sees the soldier, up on a bench, trousers down on shoes, behind a camel.
"WHAT THE HELL are you doing soldier ?
-"But you told me...camels...sex..."
-"RIDE A CAMEL and go to downtown brothel, YOU STUPID !"

Mundaka · 2005-11-01 22:23:18

Josh Cryer · 2005-11-03 15:06:23

Oh man, that Bank of Canada joke was priceless!

BWhite · 2005-11-04 10:45:29

Oh man, that Bank of Canada joke was priceless!

And I say that those of us who want to go to Mars need to be a little more like that elderly lady who went to the Bank of Canada.

clark · 2005-11-04 11:47:24

And I say that those of us who want to go to Mars need to be a little more like that elderly lady who went to the Bank of Canada.

What? Grab the bankers by the short and curlies?

BWhite · 2005-11-04 12:42:11

And I say that those of us who want to go to Mars need to be a little more like that elderly lady who went to the Bank of Canada.
What? Grab the bankers by the short and curlies?

No, play 'em. Like in "The Sting"

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#1 2005-10-22 19:10:08

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#2 2005-10-22 23:21:01

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#3 2005-10-23 06:24:14

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#4 2005-10-24 07:27:41

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#5 2005-10-24 14:53:56

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#6 2005-10-24 15:17:36

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#7 2005-10-24 15:24:30

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#8 2005-10-24 20:34:47

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#9 2005-10-25 02:03:39

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#10 2005-10-25 05:22:25

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#11 2005-10-25 10:37:00

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#12 2005-10-25 12:02:47

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#13 2005-10-30 07:53:09

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#14 2005-10-30 18:27:04

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#15 2005-11-01 22:23:18

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#16 2005-11-03 15:06:23

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#17 2005-11-04 10:45:29

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